My Life

I Need New Friends

I swear I don’t even live at my house anymore. Troy and Tanner left. Addison and Bertha are too in love to hang out. So it’s just Jonny, Ryan and me.

SO I’m pretty much over there every night drinking , studying and eating with them. I also sleep over there way too much.

One night, I tried matching every glass of whiskey with Ryan, who is over 6 feet and more than twice my size. So good thing he’s also an EMT because I had alcohol poisoning.

Three days later, I went out with Kirkland and Kate for the 4th of July and drove 30 minutes home with alcohol poisoning, puking out the window with more alcohol poisoning and then going to work 3 hours later. It was wonderful.

Four days after that, I just blacked out at Ryan and Jonny’s so who knows. But apparently Tom 2 came and picked me up from their house and I went straight to my fridge and drank moonshine out of a mason jar on my front porch.

Also, George, the dog, doesn’t like Tom 2, he peed on him. Neither do my friends but they didn’t pee on him.

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